For Such A Time As This 5/25/22

You didn't get a Preschool graduation.

You didn't get Kindergarten graduation.

I don't have any cute pictures of you in your little cap and gown to contrast to those you'll take years from now. I didn't get to capture your sweetness in those Kodak moments. And it makes me sad.

Sad that so much was robbed from you. You didn't know it then and you likely don't realize it now, well maybe you do as you see others a grade below you celebrating, but one day you will. You'll inevitably wonder why you don't have side by side pictures like your sister does and I'll have to remind you that the world changed in one short year.

I know that you were made for such a time as this. God doesn't make mistakes on when and where He puts us. You were made to grow through some of your formative years during a pandemic. So while my mama heart feels robbed because we didn't get those moments of little caps and gowns or big signs with your future graduating year, I know there is a purpose.

Perhaps nothing was robbed from you. Perhaps instead, you were made to shine and be celebrated in other ways. Like learning to nail that cartwheel, losing your first tooth, or conquering your fear of trying something new. Maybe, just maybe, we celebrated and Kodak momented some things that normally we wouldn't have because you were achieving in a time when the world was looking for things to celebrate and we got to celebrate everyday moments with you instead.

Yes, my mama heart will be a little sad when the class of 2033 graduates and I can't put your little cap and gown picture next to your big cap and gown picture in the yearbook. But I'm hopeful that at that same time, my mama heart will remember the little things it got to enjoy and capture in its place.

The pandemic may not have given us much, but it gave us the gift of time. Your learning how to land a good joke, your growing bond with your sisters, your sweet imagination, and your sweet faces lighting up when you learned to read or solve a math problem is something I may have missed if not for the borrowed time.

So I'll smile when I see the other littles. I'll nod to the mamas with tears in their eyes lamenting about how fast their baby is growing up because though mine wasn't able to be freeze-framed, my heart feels exactly what theirs is: an overwhelming sense of love, gratitude, and pride. And we were each made for such a time as now.