You Know What? I'm A Pretty Darn Good Mom

I've mentioned it before that I get that feeling like I'm somehow failing at this whole being a mom thing. I'm not a crafty mom and most things I attempt would make the Pinterest fail list in a heartbeat. I'm not a great chef, and my kids eat more chicken nuggets and pizza than I'm proud to admit. Heck some days I'm making more messes than the kids (remember What I Learned From A Puzzle In The Washing Machine?).  My house definitely has the lived in look.

So basically, I'm not Betty Crocker, I'm not Martha Stewart, and I'm not June Cleaver. I'm me, the mom that works a full time job, buys all costumes and party supplies, orders more meals out than she cooks (though I'm getting better on this fitness journey), sends her stained clothing to her grandma's for help, and whose house probably would be a pigsty without her husband.

But here's the bottom line, despite all of my shortcomings (and I know there are plenty), I'm a pretty darn good mom. Yep, I am. Here's why: my almost nine year old still thinks my kisses are magical and that they heal boo boos. All four of my girls' faces light up when I come home and they run to hug me. I let them make messes that I really don't want to clean up (hello PlayDoh and ice cream cones)! I know all the words to I Love You Through and Through, Pinkalicious, Llama Llama Red Pajama, and There Was An Old Lady Who Swallowed  A Fly by heart because at one point in time all four of my girls have loved those books. I make up a song about poop so my three year old will go to sleep (an odd request, but it makes her and her big sister giggle the sweet giggles that I love).

It's not an all inclusive list, but it reminds me that as I fix another broken bracelet or doll, wipe markers off my counters and cabinet, and remake beds and refold clothes that I just folded, I'm doing alright. I let them help make dinner (when I actually cook) and wash dishes, and it all comes with added messes. I do it because I love them and want them to be happy. I may lose my temper on occasion and yell when I shouldn't. I may get frustrated because I have a screaming kiddo clinging to my leg and I'm just trying to get dinner made.

I hope I'm teaching them to love through the messes and to forgive the mistakes. I hope through all that I'm not, I'm showing them all that I am. I'm pretty sure that being real and the best me, even on my not so great days, makes me a good mom.

At the end of the day, it's me they want to hug, to fix things, and to kiss boo boos. I know that it won't last forever because they're getting bigger. But it also tells me, that despite the fact that I'm not perfect, I'm a pretty darn good mama. And I'll take that everyday of the week.

For My Mama Friends

Here's to you mama. Here's to the hours that nobody sees. The hours of doing it all. Nope, you're not a single mom, but most of the time you feel like it. And it's hard. Damn hard. Not everyone gets it, but some of us do even though we're not in your shoes.

Your the glue behind the scenes. You're the one that gets called when somethings not going right. You drop everything and try to fix it. Whether that's running after a part, taking someone to the next vehicle, or picking up a sick kid from school, you've got it. You're there.

You spend hours making meals, doing laundry, washing dishes, and cleaning. You make sure everyone else is taken care of before you even think about taking care of yourself. Some weeks you're not sure when your last real meal was or when you washed your hair. There's housework, yard work, school, after school, pick ups, drop offs, groceries, the list really never ends. Yet you do it, day in and day out without missing a beat.

You fix boo-boos, sew on buttons, run food to more than just your husband. You dry tears when the kids are sad. You answer the questions that if you had it your way, you wouldn't field; they'd be his. You go to sleep often by yourself only to get up and do it all again the next day.

You don't complain even though it quite frankly sucks. You hold it together when the wheels are falling off and do it with amazing grace. You show love and grace without asking anything in return. You support a crazy life and his wild ideas and make it look easy.

You have your own interests and desires. You often push those aside to be the rock that you are for everyone else. Sometimes you forget who you are. You forget how special you are. I'm here to remind you: You my sweet friend are AMAZING! You are so much stronger than you know. Your faith and love are second to none. I admire the heart and soul that you pour into your life even when you feel like you're failing and not doing it right. You show grace and compassion, dignity and strength. You make me proud of you and proud to be your friend.

Don't ever forget who you are. Yes, you are the farm wife, the lineman's wife, the coach's wife, the army wife, but you are more than just that. You're the glue. You are you, and you're pretty damn amazing. Don't lose you. I see you. I get you. You are loved.

Reaping What We Sow

I read a devotional every morning when I get up. Some hit home a little more than others. I had one the other day that really stuck with me and made me wonder what I'm sowing.  This particular devotion was directed mostly toward what we reap in regards to our children, but it made me ponder beyond that.

As parents we constantly wonder if what we are doing is the right thing. We constantly struggle with how what we are doing will shape our children. Will we scar them for life with the one mistake we made? Are we too hard or too easy on them. The questions and the self doubt are constant.

When we are in school we're pushed toward continuing our education so that we can get a better job and have more than the generation before us. So we work through school. Sometimes that work pays off and sometimes it doesn't.

In life we encounter people from all walks of life. How we treat those people shapes not only who we are, but who they are. That's something that we often don't think about. The simple cause and effect of our life.

See I'm really good at pouring myself into my children. I try to give them my best. I don't always succeed. I want them to have happy memories of their childhood. I want them to remember mommy doing fun things with them. I of course want them to have more than I had. Most importantly though, I want them to know that they are loved. I want them to never ever doubt that. I want them to know my love and God's love.

As a child, my family wasn't rich. I never went without, or if I did, I didn't know it. My dad worked hard for us to have what we had. My mom was able to stay home and care for us. Both shaped me into who I am today. I remember the fun non-monetary things like picnics mom used to take us on. I remember dad working at night, but making sure he got us up every morning for school to make us breakfast. I knew love. I may have doubted lots of things as a child, but I never had to doubt that. I reaped what they sowed.

I work. I work hard. I'm fortunate enough to be in a job that puts me in a supervisory position. I am in a position to work with people from all walks of life. This position allows me the greatest opportunity to reach others. This is the area that I probably struggle with the most in reaping what I sow. I'm not sure that I'm doing what I'm supposed to to be a light for others, but I'm trying.

I've taken on a new venture in my health. As I've gotten older, my body is showing me that I reap what I sow. I've decided to sow to be a better me. Better for me, better for my family and hopefully help out some others on the way. And when I'm a better me, I'm better at all the other roles that I play.

Today I visited with my grandparents. Today I really watched my kids interact with my mom. I watched them interact with my grandma and my dad. And do you know what I saw? I saw memories. I saw love. I saw adults reaping years of sowing. It hasn't always been easy for them. There were times when they could haven thrown in the towel for a thousand different reasons but they didn't. And because they chose not to. Because they continued to pour themselves into me, my parents, my kids, I see it in their eyes. I see the love and happiness that can only come when you've truly reaped what you sow. I see it in the eyes of my kids and it fills my heart with joy.

I'm a work in progress. I want to sow better seeds in all walks of my life so that what I reap is that much sweeter. I'm forever thankful for a family that gives me grace to continue to try to get it together. More importantly, I'm forever grateful for God's unfaltering love that let's me truly see the gifts I've been given. Be patient with me, I'm trying to get better. I'm trying to be better in all that I do for you and for me because I know that I reap what I sow.

Galatians 6:7