Reconnecting

Life can be a bit crazy. In my world, some days are a lot crazy. Rob decided that he and I needed a getaway, so he booked us a trip to Mexico. Sun, fun, just adult time? Sold! So Rob arranged for child care for all the kiddos (thanks to our amazing family), and away we went.

I'll admit, I was a little nervous. Not nervous for the trip, but rather nervous for he and I. Our lives and conversations generally seem to revolve around the kids and work because we work different schedules; it sometimes seems like a briefing/debriefing of the day. Would we have anything to talk about for five whole days without those things coming into play? It'd been a good long while since we'd had that many days alone without any other factors of life driving our world.

Before dawn on a Friday morning, we left our house and headed south of the boarder. Days seemed to fly, but never seemed rushed. We enjoyed the beach. We went zip-lining, atving, and swimming in cenotes. We went downtown Playa and enjoyed the street life. We ate, we swam, we played cards. We enjoyed each other.

My fear of having little to talk about was a non-factor. Here's what I learned: we are still the same head over heels couple that we were fourteen years ago when we started dated. We still make each other laugh. We still love holding hands and kissing like it's the first time we've ever done such a thing. We laughed, we loved, we reconnected. Fourteen years later, I still get butterflies and smile when I think about it.

We're not perfect.  We face struggles and battle through them. But here's what's great, we're here. That for better or for worse thing, it's real. Some times we just need a little getaway to reconnect and remind us of where we started and how much we don't ever want to lose that. How lucky am I that I have a man that sees the same things?

Speaking of reconnecting, the annual Hopwood kids sibling weekend happened. Maui asked me why we have a sibling weekend. I originally told her it was because we like hanging out and that I hope she and her sisters do that when they're older.  Then I got to thinking about the real reason we get together. I think it's for similar reasons as the trip Rob and I took.  It's because life gets busy and we don't make time for each other in the ways that we want to or should.  So for us, sibling weekend gives us a chance to catch up, to laugh, to reminisce, and make new memories.

This year we didn't go far. We hit the Tim McGraw and Faith Hill concert in Des Moines. And while the concert was great, it wasn't my favorite part of the weekend. No, my favorite parts happened before and after.  The memories of sitting around the fire pit laughing way past my bedtime. That of five adults squeezing into one very tiny money booth and thinking we'd hit the jackpot (we collected $45 between the five of us). The awful service at the restaurant after the concert that made me realize how seriously we all take our food. That to me was what the weekend was all about.

In this life, we can't be certain of much. Yet this I'm certain of: reconnecting with those we love is never time wasted, it's time gained.

Speak Life

Over the last month I've had several encounters that really encouraged me. These events coupled with a song that I love, Speak Life, made me wonder what would happen if we all chose to speak words of life. 

Over Mother's Day I wasn't home, I was in Mexico with Rob for a little getaway. The day that we came home we picked Maui up from school. I could see her in the car line holding flowers.  Now these weren't just flowers that she picked out of the school yard, they looked like they'd come from a flower shop. She was so excited to give them to me for Mother's Day and the look of excitement on her face as she gave them to me was priceless. But here's the thing that really got me about this: when I asked her where she got the flowers, she said the trash. Here's where my heart REALLY began to smile. My Maui girl she's got this heart that sees beauty in everything. She said "mama some of the teachers threw away the flowers that they got because they started to die, but they weren't all dead. So I found the pretty ones for you." I've never had someone choose  to dig through the garbage for me, but this little girl did because she wanted to give me something beautiful when I came back. The flowers sat in a vase on my counter until there was no life left in them, but through them, she spoke life. 

A couple of weeks later I had taken the three younger girls grocery shopping with me. They had been excellent. As I as was bagging the groceries, Brylynn reminded me that we'd forgotten to get Goldfish. I told her we'd have to get them next time and I reminded her that I had a snack for them in the car when we were finished.  A lady had overheard our exchange and came over and asked if my girls could have Goldfish. I told her that they were fine and she didn't need to do that. She again asked if it was ok. I agreed. She told my girls how good they'd been and she knew how hard it was to be patient and good while waiting for mommy to finish. Each of my girls looked like they were on cloud nine because this nice stranger acknowledged the good in them. She spoke life not only to my girls, but to me through her kindness.

My Brylynn had a doctor's appointment a week or so later. Afterwards she and I stopped at Popeye's for a late lunch. As I was cleaning up our table a very polite young man told me I had a beautiful smile as he smiled back at me. Hearing that, I thanked him and found myself smiling more. It was a genuine unexpected compliment that had a lasting effect. Have you ever noticed that smiling is contagious?  He spoke words of life not only to me that day, but to others because his words had a chain reaction.

Speaking life isn't something that we do easily.  I'm not sure why we've made it difficult. Finding the good in one another and searching for the silver lining in all situations shouldn't be as low on the list as we've let it become.  Our words and actions have the power to lift each other up.  We have the ability to speak life into each other.  How much better would this world be if even once a day we chose to be the voice that spoke life?