When You Have No Words

As I sat there with you tonight, my heart broke. I listened to you and I tried to comprehend what you were saying. And I must admit, what you said struck a chord. Mainly because I'm guilty of believing it not to exist or maybe more so wanting to believe that it didn't. It's easy for me to sit back in my rural, predominately white community and think I have a clue. Our conversation proved just how much I have let the blinders of my rural life obscure.

I listened to you and I really had no words to give you. Sometimes that's alright because you just need a listening ear. But when we parted ways, my heart was heavy and I wished I'd have had the words. I don't have words for something I've never experienced, and honestly can't even pretend to understand.

I can't change the world or what happened to you. But what I can do, and what I promise  you, is that my children will be raised in such a way that your skin color won't matter. They will look and see you, the beautiful, gifted person that God made. They will see you for the person you are on the inside, not the color of your skin on the out. And they will love. They will love you for the beautiful person that you are. They won't judge you based on your race, they will judge you based on your character and even if they don't agree with you, they will treat you with respect. That I promise you. I promise you that because they will see it. I will model it. They will know that beauty, integrity, and worth is something that can't be judged from the outside.

I know this doesn't make what you are feeling better or easier. I know it can't erase the hurt that's been caused. I hope you know though, that not everyone is as narrow-minded and foolish as what you've encountered.

We've been led astray and we reap what we sow. I wrote these several months ago, but I feel the message is just as important today. What are we sowing? What are we teaching our children about the value of life? How are we showing that it's a person's skills that make them qualified, not their gender or skin color? It saddens me to think that someone I hold very dear to my heart has to try to explain to her children that to some, it does matter.

Call me idealistic. Call me out of touch. I'm ok with that. In my out of touch, idealistic world, I'll raise my children so that they don't have to listen to a friend and not have the words.

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that."     ~Martin Luther King, Jr.